Now what?

I am drained... I took my GREs this week, hence lack of post last week. I am so emotionally drained and just... lost.



I feel like I'm 19-20 again, when you're an "adult" after 18 but still don't get to do adult things. Now I graduated, so "real life" but i dont even know what real life is anymore. Or maybe the perception of what i thought was real life is not it at all.
I am no where near what i want to be doing, and as each day goes on, i fee like im losing my passion for it....
I always ALWAYS preach about keep chasing your goals, don't stop, don't let anyone get in your way. But it gets so tiring and distressing constantly being unsure of where I stand. I love psychology, i love studying the mind and behavior but i'm not doing that and i dont know how to get to do that.

I wish there was a guide to your twenties, how to overcome this stage, how to make friends after you graduate, how to avoid lame guys... I'm trying so hard to break this damn wall i have, i want to get to the other side. I want to be friends who talk about shit that matter and are open minded to new things. I want to be surrounded by people who study what i do, and we could have lunch about the newest research or newest genetic editing chemical. I'm stuck. and i dont know what to do. and i could feel it, slowly, slowly, I am stopping what i want to be doing...

i apologize for this grammatically error post, and this negative pessimistic post. It'll get better, just lost right now.